Mary J. Blige

Original Paragraph:
There is always a moment on every Mary J. Blige album that speaks to you more than any other. On her ninth studio disc, that moment comes on the very last track, "I Can See in Color," a ballad painted in deep shades of blues, gospel and old-school soul. Written for the gritty drama Precious, it's powerful, from-the-gut stuff. Although the rest of this CD doesn't pack quite the same emotional wallop, it is another strong effort form the R&B diva whose pain has always been as plain as the tear-shaped scar under her left eye. She balances contemporary sounds with classic ones, getting down with rappers Drake and T.I. on "The One" and "Good Love," respectively,, and then conjuring up vintage Aretha on "In the Morning" and the cooking "Kitchen."

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Compared to the review on Corinne Bailey Rae last week, this one is much more understandable. It uses language that everyday people can understand, and don't have to have a dictionary close by to verify. The only two things I wasn't impressed with was that the first sentence assumes everyone knows Mary J. Blige's music and her special "moments." Frankly, I don't think I've ever heard her music, so I'm not exactly sure what the author's talking about here. Also, he uses the word "stuff" and to me it sounds like he was in a hurry and couldn't figure out what to write so he just stuck that filler word in there. Completely defeats the purpose. Although this paragraph had its issues, I was overall a interesting read.