Love, Stargirl: Jerry Spinelli

Original Paragraph:
Then they show the movie. The Blob is this alien, dark red glob of goo that lands on earth and terrorizes a small town. It sounds to me--remember, I haven't seen it yet--like the Stomach from Outer Space. It just sort of slimes from place to place and oozes onto people until the people are inside of it and it's digesting them. I'm told it's actually more funny than disgusting because the special effects in 1958 were not very convincing. But don't tell that to the little kids in the audience, who are screaming away. And because of what's coming, the grown-ups talk themselves into being scared too. Everybody wants to be in the right mood, because what the Blobfest is, more than anything else, is a reenactment.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm going to re-write this Paragraph:

Then they show the movie. The Blob is this alien thing that comes and oozes onto Earth and terrorizes a town. It sounds to me--remember, I haven't seen it yet--like the Stomach from Outer Space. It just sort of slimes from place to place and oozes onto people until the people are inside it and it's digesting them. I'm told it's actually more funny than disgusting because the special effects in 1958 were not convincing at all. But don't tell that to the kids in the audience, who are screaming. And because of what's coming, the grown-ups talk themselves into being scared too. Everybody want to be in the mood, because what the Blobfest is, more than anything else, is a reenactment