Original Paragraph:
2) The Blond Guitar by Jeremy Burden
My most valuable possession is an old, slightly warped blond guitar--the first instrument I taught myself how to play. It's nothing fancy, just a Madeira folk guitar, all scuffed and scratched and finger-printed. At the top is a bramble of copper-wound strings, each one hooked through the eye of a silver tuning key. The strings are stretched down a long, slim neck, its frets tarnished, the wood worn by years of fingers pressing chords and picking notes. The body of the Madeira is shaped like an enormous yellow pear, one that was slightly damaged in shipping. The blond wood has been chipped and gouged to gray, particularly where the pick guard fell off years ago. No, it's not a beautiful instrument, but it still lets me make music, and for that I will always treasure it.
Now I will write my own descriptive paragraph:
One of the more fun things to do at my house is to immerse myself in the beautiful song "My Life" by Billy Joel on my beloved piano. My piano is nothing fancy, not a grand or baby grand, although I can wish, right? It still doesn't matter to me what shape or how good it is, as long as I can play and enjoy music. I love the songs and my piano.
1 comment:
Your paragraph is fine as far as it goes, Katie. I like that song, too. You might take another look at the intensity of the description in the guitar paragraph; it's very effective.
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